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Posts from — May 2011

Walking Black Holes – 6 Tricks to Deal With Them

Photo by Alyssa L. Miller

We meet and mingle with different kinds of people as we go through life every day. We may bump into the world’s most cheerful and charming people one day and deal with walking black holes (folks who are devoid of any positive feeling or action) the next.

What are you going to do if you happen to be living or working with these so called walking black holes? This post has 6 tactics to help you deal with them.

If you don’t know by now, I am talking about negative people. These people drain out all the happiness and energy in you. It is weird though how they usually manage to turn any event into an unhappy one. Don’t be upset. You can still do something to win over their depressing ways. Just follow the methods below:

Understand why they act this way. There are people who are negative because they care too much about you. For example, they may comment on your career choice for fear that it may not sustain your needs.

There are also those who can’t seem to be happy no matter what you do. These people are the naturally negative ones. Learn to differentiate one over the other so you can take the next necessary step.

Do not ever argue with them. It is futile to argue with them because of their unwavering (negative) view of things. They will not listen to you just because you say so. For one positive opinion you have, he or she has 10 off-putting notions to throw back at you. If you notice this kind of behavior, just back down.

Learn to sympathize with and help them. The more you offer your suggestions, the more anxious they become. Instead, offer your sympathetic self and listen to his or her woes. Doing this will gradually calm them down until they become less disturbed about the matter at hand.

By calming them down, they will eventually realize what they have to do to solve their problem. Sometimes, just asking them how they feel makes a little difference. Just let them feel that you are present for them and a helping force in their lives.

Keep things light and simple. Avoid topics that can trigger distress. Instead, focus on a variety of light and stress-free topics such as movies, parties, people, or everyday life. This is trial and error though so be careful.

After discussing different subjects, you will find the best topic that will calm them down. Lean towards that particular subject as soon as you discover it. You can also bring them to a mental happy place. You can even indulge them in sports to keep their minds off the negative stuff.

Learn to shut off the negativities. Just nod or say “okay” when he or she says something negative. Don’t absorb the negativity. This will not be easy at first but you will get the hang of it. But immediately acknowledge the person if he or she thinks or says something positive. Do not forget to do this every time so they will recognize that they are doing the right thing.

Don’t only praise their positive deeds but also their character. Why? The reason is that these people are also hard on themselves. They find it difficult to forgive themselves for their mishaps. Praise them in the things they excel on so they will start to feel good about themselves.

Steer clear from them if all else fails. But before you do this, inform them about this issue. This will help them realize that this is causing strain in your relationship. Work things out as much as possible before giving up on them.
It is but inevitable to meet this kind of people. I hope that the tips in this post will help you deal with them. If you learn to do this, you will be able to adjust yourself to different kinds of behavior. In the long run, it will help you grow as a person. Good luck!

Related Resources

How To Attract The Perfect Relationship – How to Meet, Attract, and Create a Lasting and Fulfilling Relationship With the Kind of Person You've Always Wanted


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This article was contributed by Marcy Gray who has always been fascinated in dealing with different kinds of people and personalities. In addition to that, she writes about reviews on baby care products such as whirlpool ap51030k and frigidaire fad504tdd. She has been working in the baby care industry for three years now.

May 31, 2011   No Comments