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As a coach, very often I have to put across the things that people do not like to hear… the things and patterns that people know deep down but are afraid to face… in a way that will be accepted… before reflection and healing can start to take place.
Recently, for example, I was sharing with G about the law of attraction and the subject of fear came up. I asked for G’s permission to be brutally honest with her. Not knowing exactly what to expect and perhaps allowing curiosity get the better of her, G agreed. This was an important part of the process… no point talking to a dead cow right?
Anyway, I cited an example of how G had been unconsciously preventing herself from experiencing happiness. Now, I have known G for quite a while and I discovered that she was prone to self-sabotaging behavior. Every time she found herself in a joyful state, she would begin to hold back and stop those pleasurable feelings from persisting.
I explained the concept of “secondary gains” to G and we managed to delve deeper into the roots of the issue – G feared that any happiness in her life would be short-lived. As such, whenever she felt even the tiniest tinge of happiness, she would dismiss it and worse, engage in negative self-talk and sink into a deep state of depression.
It was quite apparent that G was trying to protect herself… from getting hurt. it would be extremely painful to experience intense joy with someone and then having that person leave for whatsoever reason in the future. Yes, I understand that… for I once knew someone close who was very much like G… and her greatest fears came true… because of the self-fulfilling nature of fears.
You see, the more you focus on your fears and acting in a way to avoid them, the more they will manifest in your life. By the self-destructive actions she took to avoid the potential hurt and unhappiness she’s likely to feel because of a failed relationship, she’s preventing the start of something beautiful… ending it by the roots… How can G hope to find happiness this way?
No wonder she has been so unhappy all her life!
Remember this, you attract your greatest fears! Choose to focus on the right things… Focus on what you want… instead of what you don’t want… You attract what you think about most…
As usual, feel free to leave a comment… share the insights you’ve gotten and/or how you feel. I love to hear from you =)
P.S. There’s this program called PanicAway that I highly recommend for anyone who wants to deal with fear, panic and anxieties effectively. Click here to find out more about PanicAway…
If you like this article, buy me a fruit juice!
8 Responses to 'You Attract Your Greatest Fears!'
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So…how do you actually perform self-healing then? How do you allay your hidden fears?
Hi MLMaestro, there’re quite a few ways.. There’s EFT, there’s 7th Path Self-Hypnosis… There’s meditation etc.
You need to find something you’re comfortable with.. and that’s up to your experimentation. I don’t know much about you so I won’t be able to say much either. But do check out PanicAway… It’s something worth investing in.
I try to practice the Law of Attraction, but sometime you need a reminder, such as your post to put you back on the right track! Thanks!!!
Rebuking what you do not want takes skill and perseverance and resting comfortably in the light and in a peaceful restful stance.
[...] old, too late smart, thirty true things you need to know now * 23 inspirational quotes to live by * You attract your greatest fears! * “And”, not “or” * Enjoy the butterflies’ dance * On becoming a [...]
Thank you very much for this great article. I was once like G, and I prefer to be in a sad mode than a happy mode. I don’t even put smile on my face. But as I grown up, I believe that I deserve to be happy and look at failure, sadness, bad things as a process in life and its all about what I put in my mind.
Thank you for sharing this. I learn something great.
Thank you so much for a wonderful blog. I needed to read that and was so great to be reminded of how joyful life can be when focusing on the positive and not the negative. I got into the secret a few months ago and have seen really good results. I am so much more happire and see more over the positive than the negative. I attracted me my soul mate and he is the best most loving guy ever. Life is so magical when using the law of attraction I have seen amazing results in my life from having a positive free attitude and not focusing on what I dont want to what I do want. Thank you so very much again
Hi Yee!
I realy thank you for sharing this and other very interesting articles and free e-books.
Thank You again
Somewhere in our development a parent, teacher, coach or someone we looked up to, plants the seed of self doubt because of the way a criticism was offered to us. Have it happen enough, then the fear sets in, and you will not try to invite more criticism. I think that if you understand that, then you can deal with it.